Netflix and Chill

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Prince William seems to think he works pretty hard. He is delusional. He works hard at being a pain in the ass who avoids as many royal duties as possible. #willsabitch. Will and Kate had a public appearance this week...well, Will had two, we'll get to his second in a moment. They attended a Christmas party for a youth-support charity. Kate must not have gotten the memo that this wasn't a "Ugly and Obscenely Overpriced Dress Party" so she wore her very ugly and very expensive ( ) Christmas dress with a belt she picked up at Goodwill along the way. Even Harry is disgusted, look at his face. He hates her dress. At the party Will told someone that this was his last week of "work" before the holidays and that he was looking forward to "downtime and a chill with the family". The only way that they can be any more "down" and "chill" is if they are all put into a medically induced coma.

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Will had a busy week this week. He had to work twice...three times if you count today's Buckingham Palace Christmas Party for the extended Windsor family. Will counts parties as work. He must be beat. On Sunday night, Will presented Michael Phelps with an award to Michael Phelps at the BBC Sports Personality of the Year awards. Will made a speech which clearly wasn't rehearsed or memorized or read from a teleprompter. Either he was pulled up from the audience and forced to give a speech or he took a huge bong hit before giving his speech.

Here's his speech: You are one of the greatest sporting icons that sport has ever had, and your 23 gold medals, never mind all the other colors, pales into sheer superhuman history. You should be so proud of your achievements. It’ll be many, many years before, if ever, anyone stands here again and calls you the greatest athlete in history. So, many, many congratulations. Hopefully your retirement gives someone else a chance now. WTF, Will, WTF?

Look- Windsor wax sculptures love ugly Christmas sweaters too!!

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In more royal gossip- Will and Kate are entirely skipping out on the Queen's Sandringham Christmas celebration. Instead, they will spend the holiday with the Middletons. Sure sure, in most families, people divide their time between each side of the family..but this isn't a normal family. This is the future King of England and the other future King of England. It seems like the Queen of England and the other future King of England would decree that they all have to be together for the holiday. It also seems that someone who has a grandmother and grandfather in their 90s would want to spend holidays with said grandparent (especially when one of them is the Queen of Goddamn England) since their holidays together are most certainly numbered. Will and Kate are also skipping Prince Phillip's yearly Boxing Day shoot, instead doing their own shoot with the Middletons. Something is fishy. Will seems more and more petulant, Kate works never, and now they are skipping important family gatherings. We will have to wait 50-60 years to binge watch a Netflix series called "The Crown: Will wants to Chill".