Stuff That Happened This Week...

Lots of stuff happened this week. Here are the most bearable of the things.

1. Third time's a charm! Bristol Palin is having her first legitimate child with her current husband. He's also the baby daddy of her 2nd child, though they were not married at the time of her birth. The only reason I can actually make fun of Bristol Palin for having legitimate/illegitimate children in 2016 is that she still extols the virtues of celibacy and waiting for marriage to get pregnant in 2016. So we are even.

2. Pippa Middleton is going to marry her filthy rich, but homely as hell fiance in May. They will have their reception at her parent's home in Bucklebury, England. I'm going to let you in on a secret. One time I was feeling nosy, so I found the Middleton estate on Google maps. Jealous?

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3. Rumor has it that The Beckhams are looking to purchase a mansion in L.A. called The Manor.

This house, also known as Tori Spelling's childhood home, is the largest home in L.A. County boasting 123 room- 27 bathrooms, 14 bedrooms. Candy Spelling sold it to the Formula One heiress, Petra Ecclestone, who has now listed it for sale for $200 million. Candy was famous for having 2 wrapping rooms, a doll museum, bowling alley, and extensive storage for all of her shit in that house. If you've never seen Selling Spelling Manor, please find it on the internet, that house is nuts. And so is Candy.

4. Speaking of crazy Spellings...Tori Spelling just happened to be cleaning out her garage this week holding a box in a specific way to get a perfect face on shot when a paparazzi was conveniently passing by and took her picture. What are the chances of that!?! She was also dressed in a super cute tank that said "Body By Dean" which isn't FRIGGED UP at all because her husband is a creepy sex addict who keeps knocking her up. Which they use to keep her relevant and then have paparazzi take her photo to make some money, because neither of them have any other means of gainful employment. Her last pregnancy almost killed her and it would not have been a surprise if she were dressed in a t-shirt at her funeral that said "Body Bag by Dean" because these people are so screwed up they would market anything!!!! GAAAH, they fill me with rage.